Day 52: Ballgown and Meeting Girls in Real Life

I have been trying to put together a formal outfit for the Miss Second Life Pageant for some time now. Since its not something I make every day, I wanted to do some experimenting first. So today, I decided to make a ballgown. So what do you think? Am I ready for the ball? :)

And it is fitting that I wear a gown today to visit the Isle of Wyrms. If you ever wondered where the dragons come from in Second Life, well look not further. One of my friends brought a couple of us here to show us dragons hatching (she bought some dragon AV's). The graphics and detail of this place is amazing, and well worth checking out. But be warned, this is a restricted sim, so read the postings when you arrive and behave! Or else...well...there are many dragons here :)

So come look around, check out the Sandbox and talk to the guides! You never know...maybe you will turn into a pixie! :) To get here, Search for "wyrms" under Places. Limbo (135,119,21).



BTW, those are dragon eggs behind me! Hope they dont hatch and think Im their mommie :P

The corset of my ballgown is from Miriel. This is a beautiful piece, with amazing details. And it is also a freebie (I pretty sure it was from Free Dove, but not sure). I had wanted to wear this corset for some time, but could not find a matching bottom that goes well with it. So I thought it would make a good top for a ballgown.

The skirt is newly created using the Necklace Generator. This took a couple hours to get right, since I had a lot of problems getting the skirt to come out in the correct shape. The Necklace Generator is an amazing tool, but it could be frustrating at times, particularly for making skirts.



Fortunately, patience prevailed and I have a skirt in a nice shape. Next, I needed a texture to go with it. I filled the canvas with black, played with a few Photoshop filters, and decided to use Filter/Cloud, Filter/Glowing Edges, and Filter/Texturize (in that order) to create the base fabric texture. I added the gold trim from a pattern I got from deviantart.com. And there it is! Its off to the party.

Speaking of party, I had discussions with a couple guys in SL about meeting girls in RL and SL. I thought I would share the Real Life discussion here and the Second Life differences in a later blog.

In Real Life, most guys seem to complain that its hard to meet and get dates with girls. Any girls. They say that they talk to girls all the time and even get phone numbers. But nothing happens.

Well, from the girl's perspective, we get hit on all the time. We get phone numbers all the time. If you ask most girls, the problem is not meeting guys, but meeting the RIGHT guy. Mostly, we are looking for a sane person, relatively stable, and interested in us for the long-term. Many guys try to FAKE the long-term thing to get us in the sack (and some are VERY good at it too). Come on, admit it!

Thats why we try to slow down the pace of relationships, insist on talking to you endlessly, and - yes - even run tests on you (what you guys like to call "playing games"). I admit that I do it too. Its not that I enjoy "playing games". Its just that I am trying to find out why someone is interested in me, and what his intentions are. This is not something that you can ask a guy and get a straight, honest answer (although every guy I met says otherwise :P).

From my perspective, a stranger I meet in a store or a club is more likely to fake it than someone introduced to me by a friend or member of my family. After all, he is most likely sleeping around with whatever comes his way.

In addition, there is the danger factor. In RL, it is dangerous for me to be out alone with a stranger I just met. Bad things can happen, even in a crowded place. And for me, that is a real concern.

Personally, I have only dated people through personal introductions in real life. It is not foolproof, but I feel more comfortable. Although safety is not guaranteed, I have some reassurance that my date would at least behave himself. I can at least find out a little bit of history on the person.

Within my social circle, many of my friends date the same way. I point this out because there is no way a guy can reach my friends and me without knowing one of our friends or our family. It doesnt matter how many clubs you go to or how many girls you approach. And I dont think we are alone. In fact, I think we are probably in the majority, the silent majority.

I like to think that we are the "nice" girls. The ones who are giving and caring. The ones who want to put together a home and raise a family. The ones where people ask, "Where did you meet her?" In a good way :)

We are not the "party" girls (no offense if you are, since you are probably having a lot more fun than us :P). We dont want your money or your car. We dont go to clubs to collect phone numbers. We dont go on 5 different dates a week.

If the "nice" girls represent a significant part of the dating population, then the guys at the clubs are chasing the limited number of "party" girls available. Even at 5 dates a week, they may not be able to see all the guys there.



To reach us, you need to work on your RL social circle. You need to have friends, or friend of friends who know us. In case you are wondering how most people meet in RL, its through these relationships. Instead of hanging around clubs or tryong out new pickup lines, try parties and social gatherings hosted by friends and family. Who knows, if you see someone wearing blue at one of those parties, it may be Lady Natalia! :)